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Misconceptions About Standing, Part IV2 Comments

  1. I'm glad to read your comments about exposure as it's something I've been pondering the last few days. Some sites advocate exposing the affair to anyone and everyone who might apply pressure – friends, family, children, your spouse's boss and co-workers. Some people liken it to an intervention. They say it works to help end the affair, but I wonder at what cost? Sure, they might end it and come home, but there has to be some residual resentment that might affect the marriage in the long run. Your approach of targeted exposure seems more graceful. I will admit that when I first found out I had revenge fantasies of telling EVERYONE, but ultimately I decided that wouldn't serve me, my relationship or my children very well.

  2. This question was answered for me via the MLCers facebook page and other seeing seeing my spouse at an event where I was not in attendance. I initially wanted to vindicate myself to give an explanation, but the situation took care of itself. Though it is a stain I personally cannot remove (can I ask spouse to remove facebook page?) it is just "out there." I left that one to God and continue to hold my head up high. You are not responsible for your spouses actions or internet posts. People make side comments which make me believe they have seen the nonsense, but I move onto the next subject and keep focused on the word of God and stay focused on what God is teling me to do. God will perfect those things that concern you.
    Stay strong everyone. Love your own self/heart/mind.
    I think it is best to say nothing. When others "go there" or hint around, I leave the room, ignore them, or change the subject.

    No weapon formed against you shall prosper and every tongue that rises up against you in judgement shall be condemned.

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